alligator tears

I am all sad and upset because, so, tonight instead of going with my dad to his cousins’ house up in the hills so they can all get drunk and pass out in tents, I go babysitting with a friend. I told my dad this earlier. I do not quiet enjoy watching my dad, his girlfriend, and his cousins get sloppy drunk around a campfire (and not just because they won’t give me any alcohol- not like I drink, it’s just when there’s nothing to do but watch everyone else get drunk you get reallyy bored) Now, I was assuming that if they decided to go up to his cousin’s, he would have called me and said, hey we’re leaving. Or left a note at home. Or Blake would’ve called me. Or fucking anything, really. So I come home and all the lights are off and there’s no one here, no note no food nothing nothing. And he didn’t even call me. I mean come on. Would either of those things been very difficult? ‘AJ- went to cousins. See you in morning.’ Wtf dad. Or like one call- I’m babysitting, Dad, not taking the SAT- you can call me. ‘Hello daughter. We are leaving town. We shall see you tomorrow morning and there is a pizza in the fridge.’
So now I’m almost crying because this is the first time I’ve seen my dad in a month and he just goes and gets drunk with his cousins and doesn’t even leave any goddamned food at home.
And now I'm crying.
And Chappy is looking at me like, I understand. (Chappy is the dog)
jesus i haven't cried in weeks. my dad is a jerk. not even a fucking note
and also maybe hearing things because what is that noise?
sounds like a far off tv