DESICIONS

I CAN'T SPELL DESICIONS

but dunno what to dooo

Watch a adequate episode of Quantum Leap or take a bath?

GUH.

I think I'll go with QL.

Goddamn I love me some Scott Bakula.

paaain

God so much pain.

Leg pains and so much goddamn pain in my upper back/shoulders. Like ungodly. More than usual, and usually I'm in all sorts of back pain. And more weird nerve -shock pains. Do not want. And this spot on my back that goes numb sometimes-when I stand up or sit down or move my arm too much. What. DO NOT WANT. Dislike.

So tonight I took a bath and read The Golden Compass in the bath and tried to get more shoulders to hurt less and my hair is still all wet because I pulled it back so it wouldn't get wet but, yeah. Baths.

Still though, pain. D; Hot bath did not work.

Me and Blake started discussing...oh, Kevin Smith movies. Oh, because I was talking about Cop Out. and how it wasn't as funny as other KS movies- and so we started like, CLERKS IS AWESOME and CLERKS II IS TOO and then like we somehow started talking about the Saw movies and I said they're "torture porn! people out there getting their rocks off on people cutting their body parts off..." which Blake objected to strongly. Lol.

Agh now I wanna watch Dogma. Hnn.

Back going numb. Ergh. Weird feeling.

random thoughts

I like food. I like the taste of food and how it makes me happy and I like cooking and baking food. But I just dislike, like, the physical act of eating. Weird.

Hmm.
Went with Dad to see Alice In Wonderland but it was sold out so we saw Cop Out instead. I loved it. "I knit sweaters." "no really" "YEAH REALLY. I knit the FUCK out some big nice sweaters!" Of course I just love like anything Kevin Smith's done, so, yeah. And Bruce Willis + Tracy Morgan= win.

so now I am going to...watch Quantum Leap I think
and maybe eat some turkey with cheese and mustard
because I am all alone and bored.
This is weird, I think, judging by other people: if I am all alone in the house, I'm pretty goddamn fine. Apparently people freak out when they are all alone. Like Heather says she locks the doors and checks all the rooms and keeps the lights on. And I, er, don't? I dunno..

There's a spot on my back that goes inexplicably numb sometimes. That's weird.

bad mood

I feel like shit.

For various reasons.

One of them being apparently I can't bake.

And I want to be a baker.

Usually I forget something, misread it, add something, don't mix it enough, mix it too much. Fucking hell why am I shit at everything?

All I wanna do is crochet this little amigurumi Beatle I'm making but noo I had to make lemon bars for mom so she can bring them to her bf's house this weekend. And then of course because it's 10:45 at night I accidentally add two cups of confecteners sugar (also, FUCK YOU GOOGLE CHOME: don't tell me it's spelled wrong if you can't spell it, either) instead of one in the crust and almost started crying when I had to beat eggs and my back was hurting so much. Goddamnit. This week just plains suck and I'm so fucking glad it's over but the worst part is it's gonna start again next week. And the week after that. Fuck.

So besides being depressed I'm not doing much. Crocheting a Beatle. He's coooot so far. Not sure if it's Paul or Ringo? Cute enough to be Paul. If I added a nose it'd be Ringo. I might try a nose. And give him shaggier hair-- I mean like w/ sideburns. Goddamn my bad hurts. I don't want to go to school tomorrow. Like, crazy bad. I wonder if I just, like, went for the first few hours? I feel like complete shit. Just all around in general, shit shit shit. I'm terrible at everything and haveastupidcrushonaboy and I just want to cry 'cos I can't bake anything right.

alright

At this Knowledge Bowl meet yesterday, it was at churchy center thing, and the rounds were taking placing in some kid's learning room or something, there was all this churchy junk on the walls, and one of them was a poster of the things of the Bible, so it said 'JUDE' then 'REVELATION' and I was like, FFF I thought it said Jude then Revolution then it actually didn't BUT it was like a few letters of off. And also because Hey Jude and Revolution came out as a single together, so it freaked me out a bit.

don't follow leaders

I'm not sure if there'll ever be a time when I do not almost break down crying when I read about John Lennon's death. It's just one of those things I just cannot wrap my head around. Honestly, I...just don't understand why he was killed.

Gah. I've had Subterranean Homesick Blues stuck in my head for the last few days. Don't follow leaders, watch your parkin' meters. You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows. Stupid catchy Bob Dylan. I love his music.

woah

Like I haven't updated in foreverrr
'cos like I've been on deviantart and so like kind of neglecting this blog over here
and my computer crashed a few weeks ago, that was pretty annoying.
BUT LIKE YEAH.
OH GOSH. Ringo Starr. is going on tour. And is coming to a place called Woodinville, Washington. WHICH IS LIKE 6 HOURS AWAY FROM ME. I HAVE TO GO. I need to see a Beatle before they all die! And Paul's in Europe! And Ringo's turning like 70. THIS COULD BE HIS LAST TOUR EVER and that would be tragic. Anyway. So I am trying to convince my mom or dad to buy me tickets but I should get a job and earn my own money and all that, haha, but I did hint around that tickets would make GREAT graduation presents. Since the concert is in July. So I hope that works out.

Agh I'm bored. At dad's. Nothing to do except lay around or kill time on the computer and download bootlegs onto dad's computer because free music=<33 Maybe the Stones or some Tom Petty. Or Traveling Wilburys. Who I listened to last night. They're pretty goddamn awesome.